Gelkote

The singer song writer Harry Chapin once told the story…

My grandfather was a painter. He died at age 88. He illustrated Robert Frost’s first two books of poetry. And he was looking at me and he said, “Harry, there’s two kinds of tired. There’s good tired and there’s bad tired.”

He said, “Ironically enough, bad tired can be a day that you won. But you won other people’s battles, you lived other people’s days, other people’s agendas, other people’s dreams and when it’s all over there was very little you in there. And when you hit the hay at night somehow you toss and turn, you don’t settle easy.”

He said, “Good tired, ironically enough, can be a day that you lost. But you won’t even have to tell yourself, because you knew you fought your battles, you chased your dreams, you lived your days. And when you hit the hay at night, you settle easy, you sleep the sleep of the just and you can say, “Take me away.”

He said, “Harry, all my life I’ve wanted to be a painter and I’ve painted. God, I would have loved to have been more successful but I’ve painted and I’ve painted and I am good tired and they can take me away.”

Now if there is a process in your and my lives in the insecurity that we have about a prior life or an afterlife and God… I hope there is a god – if he does exist, he’s got a rather weird sense of humor however…

But if there is a process that will allow us to live our days, that will allow us that degree of equanimity towards the end, looking at that black implacable wall of death to allow us that degree of peace, that degree of non-fear, I want in!

June 2008 marks the 10th anniversary of graduating college with a degree in Information Technology. It marks 10 years of being an adult. 10 years with a real job and a little over 10 years since I last shared this Harry Chapin quote. I found it profound at the time but damned if I didn’t learn. Little did I know the years from 1998 to 2008 would be marked mainly as bad tired. Days with more them than me. It’s time to break out. Learn! Grow! Dream!